They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize
