Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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