New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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