if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
