i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
