Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
