Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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