Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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