is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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