I'm really into asian looking animals
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
