in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
