Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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