Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Randomize
