I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
