I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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