I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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