a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
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