All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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