Say something about gay babies.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
