New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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