This girl is more easily done than said...
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
