thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
