Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
