also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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