Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Randomize
