I wish I could punch you in the face.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
