it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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