My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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