That's intense
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
