first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
