Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Randomize
