Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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