You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
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