OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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