Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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