remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize