So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize