There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
