Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
