oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
