I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize