VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
