It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
