Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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