did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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