but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
