Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
