I can tuck mytits in my pants
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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