Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize