I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
